Enough with the Poop Stories Already

Posted by: Maggie

I know, I know, you probably don’t want to hear it anymore and I wish I didn’t have any of these stories to tell anymore. Here’s the usual warning about these posts:

WARNING!

The following post may offend the delicate sensibilities of some of our readers. Those of you who don’t want to read about a toddler’s bowel movements may want to look for entertainment elsewhere. I highly recommend the website with the cleverly captioned pictures of cats.

Love, Maggie


Yesterday I put Eleanor down for her nap at the normal time. I usually hear her talking to herself in her room for five or ten minutes until she falls asleep. About ten minutes after I put her down, the landscaping folks here at our apartment complex start to trim the hedges outside of our windows with a loud electric trimmer. I realize now that I should have just gone in and gotten Eleanor up until the landscapers were done, but I kept thinking that they would be done soon and I didn’t want Eleanor to think it was play time. So I waited and listened to the hedge trimmer and listened to Eleanor awake in her room. After about 45 minutes they were done. I know, I know, I should have just gotten her up. I heard her for a few minutes more and then I assume she fell asleep.

About an hour later I hear her crying. She usually takes a two hour nap, but lately she has been waking up about halfway through, crying for a minute or two and then falling back to sleep and sleeping another hour. So I assumed that was what was going on. So I let her cry for a few minutes and then I walked by her room. And I smelled it. It was such a horrible strong smell of poop, that I knew something was going on in there.

I walked into the room and Eleanor was standing up in her crib. I asked her, “Do you have poo poos?” She replied with a sad look on her face “Poo poo on the ground.” So I opened up the blinds and saw it. Like a horror movie come to life. Such a shocking sight that I almost called it quits right there, took off, told Eleanor she was on her own, called Josh and said I was out, he could do this whole baby thing on his own from now on.

The poop on the ground was no big deal, two very small pieces, it was the rest of the poop that was so horrifying. It was on her hands, a little on her feet, and all over the rails of her crib. I mean ALL OVER! I don’t think she did it maliciously. She wasn’t trying to make a giant stinky mess for me to clean up. I think that she just reached in to check her own diaper (something she’s been doing lately) and came out with a hand covered in poop and she wanted to clean it off. I’ve seen her do it at dinner time. She gets food all over her hands and then instead of asking for a napkin, she wipes it on the table or chair. So, I think that is what happened here, at least I hope so. I think she had a messy hand and was just trying to wipe it off ALL OVER THE PLACE! I want to scream and run out of the room just writing about it.

The worst part is that she has a little bit of a runny nose so as I’m standing there in horror, she wipes her nose with her poopy hand and now my beautiful little girl has a poop face! So I grab her up take her to the changing table where I wipe her face clean and take off her dirty diaper. We then head to the bathroom where we wash her hands multiple times and start a bath. I then have to throw her clothes and sheets into the washing machine along with my clothes, because of course I did not stay clean in the mess.

Now she and I are clean, but there still a mess in her room and it stinks! So I opened her window and got to work using baby wipes and cleaning spray. An hour later everything was clean and the room had started to air out.

We seriously need to get on top of this potty training thing, and probably move her to a toddler bed, so that this kind of thing doesn’t happen again, because I swear, I don’t know how much more of this I can take before I go insane. Arrggh I need a vacation! Or at least to be able to afford full-time daycare. This never would have happened at daycare!

3 Comments

  1. Jenny Gross 

    Ohhh they joys of poop.

  2. Josh 

    The horror…

  3. Sssooooo sorry! Last time K did this, I was out of town and my mom had to clean it up. See our blog tomorrow for our Kaitlyn bed story. We didn’t buy the converter piece that turns her crib toddler style. We have a twin bed in our guest room that she’ll get when we get a free second to buy a queen bed to replace it. Until we get the free second we have had to deal with a toddler who has realized that cribs are only where babies sleep (like the babies at daycare). Toddlers like herself apparently don’t like cribs anymore and give mommy and daddy hell at bedtime, something that she has never ever done. Tonight is night #2 of operation makeshift big girl bed. BOOOHH. Josh- I’m at UCLA’s grad fair- stop by if you can.

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  1. [...] moments where you really should just laugh about it rather than getting angry (not at all like the poop incident). She was pretty adorable with those kitty [...]

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