I Love to Swing

There isn’t much that makes me feel happier in the world than swinging. It feels like joy and freedom and magic.

One of the things that I remember very clearly from when I was in elementary school is the times when my mom would drop us off at school early. I used to go to the playground and just swing. I think I’ve always been a little bit of a loner. I really like being alone. I always have. So maybe I liked it so much because it was a solitary activity. And maybe it’s because of my disability that there wasn’t a lot I could do on a playground, but I could swing.

There was this extremely tall swingset or maybe it just seemed so tall because I was so small, but I felt like I could swing so high. It was great. I would swing and swing and close my eyes and imagine myself as my favorite characters from the books I read. I’ve always been a reader. I would imagine I was Matilda Wormwood, or Ramona Quimby, or Anne Shirley. I wanted to be brilliant, and strong, and sassy, and brave, and witty like those characters. And when I was swinging I could imagine myself that way. And I felt free and happy.

Swinging always reminds me of being that little girl obsessed with the characters in those books. But swinging also reminds me of being a teenager.

It reminds me of being in love for the first time. I was sixteen. I think it was always a Friday or Saturday night and we would to go to the grocery store and buy a quart of Ben & Jerry’s and some plastic spoons and then go to a park, sit on the swings, and eat ice cream and talk and talk and laugh like crazy and just swing. And I was in love and it felt like magic.

And now I love to see Eleanor swinging. The wind in her wild hair. The silly smile on her face. I wish she liked swinging more than she does. She’s too active to sit in one place for very long. I think she’ll appreciate it more when she can do it all by herself. But watching her swing makes me so happy. I think that one of the best things about being a parent is that you get to be a kid again too. At least a little bit. You get to experience all of those wonderful little things about childhood all over again. You only get to watch this time, but it is still pretty amazing.